


Strawberry Jam

by misura



Category: Duel With Manuel - Ppallo (Tweet)
Genre: Multi, OT3, Twitter
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-06
Updated: 2020-11-06
Packaged: 2021-03-08 19:55:33
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 647
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27452353
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/misura/pseuds/misura
Summary: Ppallo @Ppallo   8 SepThat awkward moment when you grab your wife for a fully consensual kiss “don’t cry just because I’m dying” and it turns out it just started raining and also Manuel is not my wife.
Comments: 9
Kudos: 12
Collections: Yuletide Madness 2020





	Strawberry Jam

**Author's Note:**

  * For [mriaow](https://archiveofourown.org/users/mriaow/gifts).



> [link to tweet](https://twitter.com/Ppallo/status/1303259816442368000)

Ppallo @Ppallo 8 Sep  
"It's just some strawberry jam!" I cry, gamely gasping for breath as my wife compliments Manuel on the elegance and force of his thrust like a lovable minx who will not be doing the laundry tonight.

Ppallo @Ppallo 8 Sep  
Romance is putting your head in your wife’s lap as you lay dying while she’s keeping the grapes to herself instead of feeding them to you because “now you’re just being silly, dear”

Ppallo @Ppallo 8 Sep  
“Who needs pathos when you can have pathé?” like can’t we have both? Because I’ll have you know my wife has excellent taste in both men and victuals.

Ppallo @Ppallo 8 Sep  
Amendment: romance is putting your head in your wife’s lap as you lay dying while she feeds grapes to the man who killed you while looking very dashing handsome and elegant. 10/10 would be killed by again

Ppallo @Ppallo 8 Sep  
Upon it being pointed out that my last tweet left some doubt as to who was being dashing handsome and elegant: I love my wife, and she could probably kill me. I also love Manuel and he has, in fact, killed me. So you can see my dilemma here.

Ppallo @Ppallo 8 Sep  
That awkward moment when you grab your wife for a fully consensual kiss “don’t cry just because I’m dying” and it turns out it just started raining and also Manuel is not my wife.

Ppallo @Ppallo 8 Sep  
“Only fair,” my wife says, which I’m sure is true, but I kissed Manuel for maybe ten seconds tops and it’s been five minutes now and you just cannot have a good death scene while being rained upon. Rain is for the funeral, where everyone can have a good laugh at the guy who forgot to bring his umbrella, usually me. 

Ppallo @Ppallo 8 Sep  
Nothing like being carried home bridal style by the man responsible for killing you while your wife gushes over how strong and muscular he is, like I’m dying here, maybe let me get in a bit of gushing too?

Ppallo @Ppallo 8 Sep  
“Is there a doctor in the house?” Well, yes, because my wife is amazing like that, which you would know if the two of you would spend more time talking and less time making out. Still, as long as I get to watch and occasionally join in I guess it’s cool.

Ppallo @Ppallo 8 Sep  
Rather than ‘if you can’t beat them, join them’ how about ‘if you can’t duel them without dying, listen to your wife invite them to stay for a threesome while making flattering comments about your sexual prowess’ which may be a bit wordier and not entirely true but sometimes life is like that.

Ppallo @Ppallo 8 Sep  
“You taste like strawberry jam” sorry did you mean that in a good, bad, or a ‘like you, I am a bit intimidated and very turned on by your wife so now I’m just talking nonsense’ kind of way? All three answers are acceptable of course I’m just curious.

Ppallo @Ppallo 8 Sep  
Expert swordsman, my ass. Match made in heaven, or rather, with the glowing approval of my wife who will join in as soon as I’ve finished doing the laundry.

Ppallo @Ppallo 8 Sep  
“This bed isn’t big enough for the three of us!” I cry in a burst of ardent, jealous passion, ready to remedy this situation post-haste, but my wife reminds me the neighbors own several mean dogs so we will have to wait until tomorrow to visit the carpenter-slash-local-crime-lord and see what can be done.

Ppallo @Ppallo 9 Sep  
“Good morning” well that all depends on who’s going to get kicked out of bed to make breakfast, doesn’t it? My revenge will be crispy on the outside, soft on the inside and smell like baked goods.


End file.
